Dear Zuri:
I met N in an airport in Texas. I dropped my ticket and he returned it to me. From there, we started talking and found out we were both going to Monterrey, Mexico. He was very sweet and he gave me his email address and cell phone number. We exchanged a few emails before he called me up at my hotel to ask me out for drinks.
I rejected him twice. I don’t know why, maybe because I don’t like to drink. I called him after that and sent him a friendly email but he seemed cold and distant. I don’t know what is happening.
I want to know if he feels angry or insulted by me for rejecting him? He seemed interested in me and liked me but am I just one of the many girls that he approaches? Do you see me and N becoming good friends and will N get back in touch with me? Thank you so much and I look forward to hearing from you.
– C 6/81 and N 6/83
Hi C!
My tarot cards indicate that he came on strong initially but he didn’t like the blocks that you put up by rejecting his drink invitations and disappeared, leaving you feeling abandoned and confused. Refusing to go drinking with N was a good choice and not the real reason he backed away. He was not looking for a friendship when he contacted you. He was looking for an easy lay and a good time. When he realized you were not going to give him what he wanted, he moved on to pursue other women. That is why he changed on a dime when you refused him and was not the nice friendly guy you first met.
This wasn’t a love connection for him or even an attempt at getting to know you for a potential serious relationship. In his mind, he was only going to put in enough effort to get you to meet him for drinks. If that wasn’t going to happen, he was ready to move on because getting to know someone for more than just sex is just too much work and that there are a dozen girls that would fall for his superficial attention. Bottom line, this guy’s focus is on partying and he has no intention of contacting you again for a friendship or anything meaningful.
So be proud that you stayed true to yourself and did not go out drinking just to please a guy. Celebrate your strength that you turned him down and waited for a better offer. Turning him down was a good test of his intent. Your spirit guides were protecting you from getting involved in an encounter that would not have been what you are ultimately looking for. The tarot cards show me that N is passionate foreigner who acts on his passion but is really just out to see the world and what it can give him. He’s only thinking about himself and his needs. You are looking for more of a serious connection, which he cannot give you.
The final cards in your spread are a strong message to be careful – there are a lot of players out in the world. Keep testing them to see if they are real, and if they are not then do not be afraid to move on. Let it go, learn from this experience and keep searching for the true spiritual men with heart. Do not be fooled by men who can’t follow through. Your guides support this message that you need not be afraid of making decisions that protect your interests.
I feel there is a lesson here from the Universe that you were meant to meet this man to teach you to be careful and not just fall for a pretty face. Look deeper into the motives of men who ask you out and maintain higher standards. Men love a challenge. If they are truly interested, they won’t give up even if you turn them down the first time. Players don’t have the attention span to develop a real relationship but the right kind of guy who plans on being a permanent fixture in your life will put in the effort to win your heart.
Blessings!
Zuri
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