Dear Zuri,
My ex and I had a bad breakup. Until now we had not contacted each other for about 11 months, though we did bump into each other during March as we were in the same college. So I would like to know if she will come back to renew the friendship and if there is also a possibility to reunite in the future. She is already in another relationship but still I can’t seem to let go of her. Thanks…
– IC 6/84 and CC 1/85
Hi I!
Being born right on the cusp of Gemini and Cancer has your thinking at odds with your emotions. Your head may be telling you it’s time to let go because it’s been over a year since your split but your heart insists that this Capricorn is the only one for you as it mourns the loss daily and wants to go back to the familiar. She just did not want to invest any more energy into the situation because it did not make her feel supported or good about herself. Your relationship was filled with emotional chaos, which C grew tired of and wanted to pursue a new connection with an ex that she feels has more light hearted and fun energy.
Intuitively, I felt your relationship was filled with lessons of balance, learning about what was really fair and just in a partnership. Throughout the course of your time together, a growing sense of awareness of the power struggles and mood swings became apparent, which led to a spotlight on the brick wall slowly being erected between the two of you as your many differences came to light. You two are no longer operating on the same vibrational frequency and have different needs in a partnership. When a relationship is immersed in drama and cat fights, the cosmic scales will tip and create events to end what is not in someone’s best interest. Your spirit guides show me that the karmic lessons between you have been fulfilled and it is time to move on. You are not meant to remain together as a couple. You need someone who can balance you out and who can inspire you to be a better person.
Any attempts to reconcile on your part will be short lived because I see her current partner remaining in the picture. So, at this point she does not appear open to a friendship until the issues that caused the rift repair themselves. For that to happen you have to do some serious self work to heal and be honest with yourself about the reasons you are really looking to reconnect with her. You may say you just want to be friends but deep down the main reason you want a renewed friendship is to get a foot in the door in the hopes of rekindling a romance with her. And that will only cause you pain waiting on someone whose heart not only belongs to another person but is no longer in the same place it once was.
There are deep seated issues here that stem from a fear of being alone and lack of self love that need to be addressed before you can be ready to enter any new relationships, platonic or romantic. Also it’s going to be important to work on communicating productively and learning how to disagree without attacking, controlling or putting the other person on the defensive. This self work may be easier to accomplish with the help of a qualified therapist or counselor in your area for the best results. So those are some of the emotional areas this relationship forced you to become more conscious of and work on. Growth comes from the willingness to stop living in the past and centering yourself in the present. Once you master these issues that have kept you stuck, future relationships will be more harmonious, emotionally fulfilling and healthy for you.
Blessings!
Zuri
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