Dear Zuri:
I was with this woman for seven of the best months of my life until she broke my heart in November. She became involved with someone else but has since broken up with him, maintaining that friends with benefits connection that you describe in your articles. She stopped talking to me in February because that’s when the new guy asked her out. Then out of nowhere she called me on February 25.
She told me she broke up with him because she was not ready to be with him but still sees him casually. We talked for four hours just catching up on things and the other days we talked on the computer IMing each other. Man, I miss and love her. Just to let you know she called me, I did not call her.
We are still friends because she said she will be there for me and I said the same. Will that friendship lead to real love? Are we going to get back together? What is going to happen with the other guy? I know I have to work on self love for her to see it. Thank you for your time and I hope to hear from you soon.
– CR 1/87 and VT 8/85
Hi CR!
I decided to consult my trusty tarot cards to get a clear picture of where your ex is at emotionally and what is going to happen between you, her and this other guy. Even though she feels a relationship with you would be grounded, reliable and stable, she does not value what you have to offer because it’s too easy and feels that she can have it anytime she wants. The problem is she views you as the nice guy and she is attracted to a challenge, someone that excites her and offers more of an unknown.
Right now, she is guarding her heart because she is simply not ready for any committed relationships. She finds flaws in all of them. She is running from one relationship to the next, searching for something that can only be found within herself. And, until she learns that lesson, she is bound to repeat it. Much soul-searching is in order before she can be ready to choose any one person for a healthy and balanced relationship. First loves can be hard to let go of and the good feelings you felt while in a relationship with her are causing you to feel as if you can’t do any better than her. Because of this, you will try to do whatever it takes to win her back. However, you have to step back and think about whether this is right for you at this time. Considering she is opting for a friends with benefits relationship with the other guy, her reasons for reaching out to you again are more to fulfill her ego and boost her self-esteem by your attention.
In the meantime, she has not closed the door completely on that other guy since her tarot spread shows her thinking about him and keeping her options open. Despite the other guy still being in the picture and wanting a deeper relationship, ultimately things will not work out between them because the reasons for their split are still ever present.
Right now, she has the best of both worlds, the other guy to fulfill her physical needs and you to fulfill her emotional ones. My psychic advice is to walk away until she can reach out to you with authenticity, not just as a life preserver while she flounders. Once she realizes she really is totally alone, she may stop long enough to find her true feelings. She is attracted to men that are confident and that show strength. So if it’s meant to be, the ONLY way she will return and give to you completely is if you show your own personal strength, take care of yourself, and walk away until she can “grow up”. You want her to choose you because she truly wants to be with you, not because you’re a good second choice or the rebound guy.
Blessings!
Zuri
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